Spontaneity is a gift. There is no better feeling of triumph than giving someone an answer that will shut his mouth and stop uncouth blabbering. "mooh tod jawab" as they say in Hindi, it is an art. Some people simply excel at this art and are exceptionally gifted with an immaculate sense of timing. One of them is my brother Pushkar. Many years back, one day he was studying in the drawing room as usual and I was watching TV as usual. The cable TV guy came for collecting his money. My father came walking out into the drawing room reciting prayers. The cable guy, known for his poor demeanor and mannerlessness, looked at my father and asked me, "Yeh Tumhara baap hai kya?". My brother replied, "Nahi to kya tumhara baap hai kya?"
At a friend's wedding reception back in 2004, a kid got greedy for more eggs. I was serving rice and sitting beside me, was another friend Imtiaz. The kid came back three times and took three eggs. A little embarrassed for the fourth egg, he brought his father along. His father said to Imtiaz, "Kya hai ki, mere bete ko Andey bahut pasand hai" To which, my friend replied, "Aap ghar mein ek murgi paal lo phir"
A few years back, we were eating Pani-puri when a drunk man arrived at the Thela and started abusing everyone. He wasn't even able to stand straight. He was prefixing the word "lau**" with everything and for everyone. Everyone was getting pissed with his Yeh kya hai lau**, Woh kya hai lau**, Pani de re lau**, Puri de re lau**, This lau**, that lau** and so on. The very patient pani-puri wala said to him, "lau** sab ke paas rehta ji."
My dear friend and colleague Hubert is another gifted man. He narrated an incident from 1980s. Enter the Dragon had released in India. At SHALIMAR theater, he went along with a friend to watch a Karate movie for the first time. After the show was over and people started walking out of the theater, a fight broke out between two or three people. My friend Hubert said to his friend, "Yeh Dekha, dedh ghantey mein Bruce Lee"
- Deepak Karamungikar
7 comments:
First and Third were just Slap on the Face hahahah... Sharp and Smart... Spontaneity hahaha...
Too true. One gift that's truly rare and a lot of people are left wanting. Me included.
Should add, you have one mean tongue yourself. Why don't you post details of the Metro meeting.
Haha I still remember that one.
;)
I happen to have a sharp tongue too when needed... Jab maarne ki iccha hoti hian, toh wat laga deta hoon, woh bhi pyaar se :)
hehe..interesting post, as usual!
Good one - you can actualy go on and on, with more anecdotes on the topic...
There was this guy I knew who had this obsession for using Lau** as prefix or suffix in each line he spoke... One day we put him to place by just telling him... Tere muh me hamesha Lau** rakh ke ghoomta kya re
LOL
My sister is like that. Once someone ate what amma had cooked and commented "Vedhava koora" implying bland curry. At which my sister who must have been 12 then, promptly said... "Vedhava kaadu. Punistree koora e. Pasupu kumkamu rendu unnayi kada. " (It's not a widow curry. It married. It has both pasupu and kumkum... symbols of being married). The person was shocked and clueless. At which she pointed to the mirchi powder( red) and haldi ( yellow)containers on the kitchen shelf.
The person was speechless. :P
J
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