Thursday, July 7, 2011

DON'T TALK RUBBISH: Ad film maker with an IQ of 120 discovered.


Inspired by my childhood favorite TV programmes, 'Ulta Pulta', 'Flop Show' and by the famous 'Faking News', I thought even I should give Satirical News a try. I will call this series 'DONT TALK RUBBISH'. I hope you will like it as much as you like my short stories and blog posts. The first one in the series is here.

DON'T TALK RUBBISH: Ad film maker with an IQ of 120 discovered. 

If the sources are to be believed, the unimaginable has happened. An advertising film maker with an IQ of 120, yes, 120 has been discovered. However impossible it may seem, there actually exists an Indian ad film maker with such high IQ. Meet Mr. Ashish Dimagwala, the smart ad film maker. 

Ashish Dimagwala was found selling Vada Pav near Juhu chowpaty. An old colleague from the intelligent-days of TV advertising instantly recognized. Apparently, Ashish has a very sad story to tell. 'I was sacked because I was intelligent and could make good ads,' he said with tears in his eyes. 'There was no place for someone like me. Our industry needs people with IQ in the range of 20-25. Some freshers also come in with an IQ of 5 and make the Idea and DoCoMo ads'

Before he was sacked, Ashish Dimagwala was under tremendous pressure to make dumb ads but given his natural instincts, he failed at every attempt and was finally sacked. He was often ridiculed and tortured for being smart. His colleagues found him unsuitable for the industry. ‘They used to say itna dimag lekar kya karega?’ he said as tears rolled out of his eyes. ‘They also tried to brainwash me, but I didn’t listen to them,’ he added.

Ashish Dimagwala is now a happy man selling Vada Pav and is soon going to expand by starting five more branches. He doesn’t want to get back to ad films any more. ‘I was scared that I would become like them. But luckily I survived the retardedness around me. They had started a movement on the lines of ‘Size Zero’ called ‘IQ Zero’ that was when the DoCoMo ad was being made and I was sacked,’ he said.

On the other hand, Ad Filmmaker’s Association of India has denied all such rumors and has termed Ashish Dimagwala as ‘Fraud’.  ‘It is impossible for any ad film maker in India to have an IQ of anything above 40. 120 is a ridiculous number and I think Mr. Dimagwala is a fraud and is trying to gain some cheap publicity. We, on behalf of the agency deny the existence of any such professional,’ said Mr. Ch. Nandan, the chairman of AFAI who personally boasts of an IQ of 2.5.

Denying allegations of intelligence, Ch. Nandan said, ‘If you want, you can check all the ads on TV. If any of them can be termed as ‘smart’, I am ready to strip in public,’ he said. ‘As an industry, we have never tolerated smartness. It is a fundamental norm. We ensure that all ads we make, especially the FMCG ones are dumb. I promise that we would maintain the same dumbness at all times.’

- Deepak Karamungikar 
*Pure satire. Nothing serious.*

4 comments:

Amrit Panigrahy said...

Fresh idea! Good one as always!! :)

Abhra Pal said...

Absolutely loved the post. Good luck with your writing!

Kaushik M.G.R said...

Too good Deepak.... Always loved your sarcasm. Keep them coming !

kaushik Sudheendra said...

hahahah ....."As an industry, we have never tolerated smartness" .... this is 100% correct .... awesome ....